Many people have said to me that I am so brave to have a husband in the nursing home. My response to that is generally "WTF?" What are my options? To not move forward anymore?
I just listened to Anne Bancroft, the explorer who traversed both the North and South Pole. She doesn't feel like she was courageous for having done so.
She said the every day things often take much more courage. She got a card from a 5th grader once that
said "I understand how scary a new day can be, I just changed schools."
Anne also talked about how women, in particular, defer their courage. We
often are told we are so courageous and we say "No, no...not me". But Courage
is relative to where you are.
Courage is going forward into a place where you can not see the destination,
putting one foot in front of the other while pulling a 1400 pound sled. Isn't
that what we do daily with our loved ones? We don't know what the day will be
like when we rise in the morning. We've lost our own futures - if that isn't a
1400 pound sled we're pulling, I don't know what is. And yet, we do it. One
step at a time, one foot in front of the other. We whine a little bit (or a
lot) along the way. We seek companionship from others who know our plight. But
we get out of bed, and sometimes, that is the biggest act of courage for a
caregiver.
And having others to help you pull that sled? That's God's gift.
