Every person has both kinds of memories. But we live in the present, not the past. Ask God for grace to find His lessons in every event and every memory, to let go of the past, rejoice in the present, and reach for the future--"the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:13-14).
Meditation is the best help to memory.
Matthew Henry
One thing that is happening is I am changing my mind about every other hour about John's future. He's improved so much, I actually allow myself to hope that I could bring him home. But you know what? I cannot predict the future. That's above my pay grade. I have a plan. A man and a plan. And right now the plan is to live right now. Let the future take care of itself.
That's so much easier said than done, though, isn't it? Why is that? I would say mostly because of money. If we were people of any means, I wouldn't be spinning all of these scenarios. I'd know that tomorrow would be cared for.
I am also trying desperately to hold on to our family cabin so that it continues to be a source of rejuvenation for the Marsh Family, knowing that the sale of the cabin would provide funds which would allow me to live in the present a little better.
So - the plan is to try and let go of the worry. That's not easy for me. I'm a natural planner for the future. And now at the moment of life and death, I simply cannot shed that side of me anymore than I can shed my DNA.
Let go and let God. OMMMMMMMM.
